hi there

when i reflect on moments where i felt most aware of my body, i think back to middle school. i think about how i got a push up bra and wore it to school for the first time, gave a boy i liked a hug, and he pulled away and said "ew why do your boobs feel so hard?" (trust me, i cringed again just now reliving this), i remember when i wore eyeliner for the first time and a boy said "you look better without that weird stuff under your eyes," and i remember trying on a volleyball uniform, raising my arms, seeing hair, and immediately feeling disgusted by the hair. i asked my mom if i could get a razor, she said i was too young, and we compromised on nair instead. 

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through trial and error, acceptance and rejection, embarrassment and fitting in, we are all told what is acceptable and not acceptable in our bodies. at a young age we begin to listen to our peers, media, loved ones, and trusted figures to tell us how we should look, act and be in our own bodies. it's not our fault, we were (are) just trying to belong and it's not their fault their voices were (are) louder than ours.

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so middle school continued as i explored growing up (bras, makeup and shaving), then high school came and i explored what it was like to be attractive to others (makeup, tight fitting clothing, wanting to be the perfect mix of skinny and thiccc), and in college i felt old enough and wise enough to know i didn't want to keep presenting myself just so i could feel accepted by others. i could feel that i wanted to live my life in the way i wanted to, but i had no idea how to listen to myself. i had no idea how to trust myself. so that meant college was a fun time of trying to figure out how to be the healthiest version of myself while continuing the patterns of listening to other voices than my own.

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fast forward to 6 years after college and i have a better understanding now for why the diet plans, exercise plans, and morning routines never stuck - i was forcing myself to do things i didn't actually want to do under the assumption i needed to be more disciplined, i needed to love myself more, and i needed to choose myself more. these are not inherently bad, they are just not the truth. the truth is simple: i need to listen to myself.

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i'm assuming you can also benefit from listening to yourself more too. do you actually enjoy doing the whole-30 diet? do you enjoy going for runs? do you enjoy adding kale into your smoothies? do you know how to slow down? do you trust yourself to make decisions?

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i am now  a certified Integrative Nutrition Health Coach through The Institute of Integrative Nutrition. i have learned so much about myself since the start of my certification and i want to support you in your journey as well. if you are curious what a life listening to yourself looks like, one where we really quiet the noise of what we think we should be doing and focus on the voice, our voice, telling us we actually know what to do, then hop on board the "let's figure this out" train and learn more about my 1:1 health coaching services. 

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i'm glad you're here :)

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